“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.
And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger – something better, pushing right back.”
― Albert Camus
This is a brain dump kind of blog. It’s about being disabled in an ableist society, being sick in a well society, and fighting against all the preconceived notions sick people like myself encounter daily. There have been several iterations of this blog, but I think I’ve finally settled on a single place where I can say the things I feel I must say, especially living in today’s world.
My name is Hannah and I am a bibliophile, a fiber artist, and an aspiring historian. I am a child of God and an imperfect activist. I feel much of my pain deep within myself, right next to where I experience others’ pain. I am empathetic to a fault (emphasis on the pathetic). Most importantly, I have a best friend named Rufus. He means everything to me.
I struggle daily with a host of illnesses, chief among them Systemic Lupus Erythematosus (SLE or lupus for short), fibromyalgia, depression, and chronic PTSD. My fight will last my entire life. Everything I’ve been diagnosed with is incurable. While I appreciate all love and encouragement, I would ask that you hold your pity at bay. I am willing to speak with you about the fear you feel when reading about my life or the anger, but I am not a pitiable human being. I reject it wholly and ask, if you do feel such an emotion, that you examine your reasons for feeling pity first before you express how sorry you are about my present conditions.
Being disabled defines me, and I am proud to stand among the incredible people who also share this moniker. There is nothing innately sad about my situation. In fact, there is quite a lot I find profoundly beautiful.
I am always looking to learn. If I have slighted you as a minority (i.e. LGBTQIA+, persons of color, etc), I am always willing to hear and learn what I have done wrong. It is not your job to educate me, but if you feel strongly and want to correct me, my ears are open.
I will, to the best of my ability, include trigger warnings in my posts. If you have suggestions, please let me know.
Otherwise, welcome crafters, readers, spoonies, Christians, and everyone else. I’m so excited that you’re here.